Tolerance & Love

Can you stand this chubby faced little boy (James 18 months/2yrs)? Not to mention the dashingly handsome man holding him.

Last year I began a tradition of choosing one overarching theme to be my New Year's resolution. I learned this idea from my talented friend, Danielle. Last year's was to be more open to allowing people into my life, my home, etc. Making time for others and not being so protective of my time and space...opening myself up to service and experiences that I typically would shy away from. I know that seems like a long winded goal. Nonetheless, it was my theme for last year.

This year my goal is to tolerate and love people I don't understand. Man o man I did not realize what a challenge this would be?! This goal has come with an awareness about myself that I have recognized in the past just not to the extent I do now: I am NOT like most people. I guess that's a good thing but it's also made my goal much more grandiose and challenging.
This goal has also taught me something else about myself (and it's only January 13th?!) I get frustrated when people don't see eye to eye with me. I think I'm accepting of other schools of thought but I'm painfully intolerant. It's really an unfortunate awareness. I don't like this about myself but I'm coming to find that I need to accept others even and especially if they don't agree with me--regardless of the topic.

Last night during running group I realized that I differ immensely from my thoughts on when and how to teach my children (children in general) about anatomy, sex, etc. I guess I'm some kind of a perverse radical?! I realize it is a fine line between openly and flagrantly talking casually about sex and keeping it a sacred, precious topic. I think you can accomplish both! Not that I want my kids to be casual about sacred topics but I want them to approach ME with their concerns/questions/thoughts. I feel strongly that in order to achieve this level of trust and openness I need to begin from the time they are very small. There is nothing embarrassing or shameful or gross or weird or whatever about bodies and how they work. They are immaculate and glorious creations! My children will also learn and have learned from me that they are powerful and sacred and need to be carefully protected.
Of course our discussions are age appropriate but with that being said age appropriate has a very different meaning now than it did 30 years ago. When your six year old comes home from kindergarten and asks you what "F$*&K" means you quickly realize that in order for your children to learn things from you and not on the playground from the other children you have to start a bit younger than you may think. (Side note: no, I did not explain to James that the "F-word" is a slang and salacious term for sex. I just told him it is a horribly filthy word and he should never say it and if he hears others saying it he should ask them to stop).
Thank goodness for Richard and Linda Eyre who have raised 9 fabulous children (I can honestly say that because I've met every last one of their kids and happen to be close friends with one of them). I am thrilled that they have made it their livelihood to share their fine wisdom with the rest of us flailing fools (me at the front of that line). THIS BOOK is fantastic. I recommend it highly, of course but you may not agree with their approach...and that's okay because I am tolerant and I love people I don't agree with or understand :)